no news

I am obsessed once again with checking my own e-mail. I call it self stalking. Weird I know but I am driving myself crazy. I literally get OCD about. Sad thing is when I don't find the e-mail I am waiting for I search the internet as if I am going to find it lost in cyber-space or hidden on someone's blog.

See I have this issue, (well I guess that's kind of obvious.) Seriously though the issue revolves around well adoption. I kind of consider it the "Taking of the pregnancy test." You know the gathering of more information. I never know if I have used the correct form of communication. Whether it be e-mailing or calling. If I pick one I try not to do the other. If I do both like e-mail first I try not to leave voice mail when calling. I guess I felt very urgent and like time would run out (the feeling we always get with this adoption stuff). Of course what i feel is pressing in the broad scheme of things is not and I know others have much more pressing questions but well there it is. A jumbling, rambling mess of well crap. I know this post makes no sense. Except for the fact that it is my right to vent. It is also my right to feel that my needs are urgent and to present them as so. I do need to realize that it is also my right to be put in my place when said needs are not as urgent as I think they must be. In the end more e-mail responses but still no information.

Sorry I really thought the second time would be different but I was wrong.

Oh and I know it sounds like we are for sure going the adoption rought but we aren't, like I said it was just a question.

Speaking of watching paint dry, you would think that the fact that I have our whole kitchen torn apart and am painting our cabinets (inside and out) that I would be distracted enough not to notice. Unfortunately I still get on the computer with my sawdust paint covered hands just to see no news...ahhhh!